Breaking Free: How to Overcome ‘Yes Syndrome’ and Prioritize Self-Care

Are you tired of feeling like you're constantly juggling too much, all because you can't seem to say no? If you're nodding along, then welcome to the club of perpetual "yes-sayers." But guess what? It's time to ditch that membership and liberate yourself from the shackles of "Yes Syndrome."

Saying yes to things when you don't have the energy, or you just don’t want to, is harmful to yourself. That is why it is time to break free from “Yes Syndrome.”

“Yes Syndrome” is saying yes to whatever people need no matter how it may impact you. It’s prioritizing others over yourself, pushing aside your goals and values for others.

Why is it so hard to say no? There are a myriad of reasons: cultural expectations, family dynamics, societal pressure, fear of rejection, or lack of role models.

Our brain wants to avoid pain, A.K.A. the response we may receive from people after saying no. So we say yes to avoid that discomfort, however, we still endure discomfort because we’re now doing something we didn’t want to.

How do you push back against the fear of “disrupting” cultural expectations, societal pressures, etc.? You have to learn to say no.

For example, someone invites you to a networking event, but you cannot make it work because of multiple projects on your plate. Instead of saying yes, and becoming miserable, here’s how to say no. 

Try something like, “That sounds like a great opportunity, but the timing isn’t right for me.” Or “Thanks for thinking of me, but I won’t be able to make it this time.”

I love to quote Brene Brown, who says, “Clear is kind.” And that is my rule when it comes to saying no, be clear and be kind.

You don’t need to apologize when you say no; you are setting a boundary. People may be disappointed by receiving a “no,” but always remember it is not your job to protect your peace AND someone else’s peace. You are only responsible for your peace. 

To get what you want in life, and to achieve your goals, the ability to set boundaries and say no are crucial. Don’t forget, if you are saying yes to everyone else, you are saying no to yourself. 

Nobody has the bandwidth to do everything, saying no allows you to prioritize the most important things. If you’re having a hard time saying no and would like assistance, contact me. I would be happy to help you learn to say no to help you achieve your goals.